Breathe
by GotU
Summary: Sequel of sorts to Staring, but can be read seperately. This is in James' POV, and it's about him and Lily and how they get together, blah blah blah. A streamofconciousness fic.


Title: Breathe  
Author: Gotu  
Rating: PG, I suppose.  
Disclaimer: Not mine, you know the routine. Go worship JK Rowling and her brilliant characters. I'm just having my evil way with them.  
A/N: Sequel of sorts to _Staring_, but can be read alone. This is in James' POV, and it's about him and Lily and how they get together, blah blah blah. A streamofconciousness. Just read and please review.  
Oh yeah, and thanks to my reviewers for the last chapter of _Staring_: **KMK**, **13x**, and **Katsu Kitsune**!

* * *

Out of the corner of my eye, I'm watching her. No, I'm not a stalker, damn it! I just happen to like looking at lovely things, and she is quite lovely. Her eyes are the brightest green that reminds me of emeralds, and her hair is red with golden streaks that shine when she's near the fire, like she is right now. She has the palest skin, and little freckles that are almost unnoticeable in the winter, but when it gets toward summertime, she's got freckles all across her nose, and they fade onto her cheeks and forehead, and little freckles on her arms and legs. And she has the cutest dimple on her left cheek that shows itself when she smiles. 

Ok, so maybe I'm looking at her quite blatantly now, because she raises an eyebrow like she always does when something puzzles her. It's a skill, to do that little raising-one-eyebrow thing, I'll tell you. I still can't get it. Oh god, she's coming over here. Ok, breathe, act natural, don't run your hand through your hair, _keep breath…_

"What is it, James?" ACK! SHE CALLED ME JAMES! The Gods are looking down upon me, I know it! Keep breathing, keep breathing…

"Nothing Lily. Why? I mean, it wasn't as if I was obviously looking at you, was it? Because I wasn't, you know. I mean, I might have accidentally looked at you from the corner of my eye, but that doesn't mean that I was, y'know…" Oh no, I'm rambling again and she's looking at me like I've got three heads. Breathe, breathe, if she thinks you're weird, it's not the end of the world.

No, of course not. I've only liked this girl for _six bleeding years_.

"Actually, James, I was just going to suggest we go do our rounds. It's 10:00, you know, and I think we were scheduled to go now, unless you don't want to. I can just go with Severus or something…" What? The love of my life spend an hour alone in the dark corridors with my worst enemy? I think not.

"Er, yeah, sure. I'll go with you." Of course, my voice decides to go all squeaky _now_. She has a funny little smile, almost like a smirk, and I'm scared now. I know many of Lily's Faces, maybe more than anyone else, and I have never seen that one. Until now.

"Come on, then", she says. Her voice is melodic, and I know that she sings. Not that I ever snuck into our joint shower in the Head's rooms and heard her or anything. Just, her voice sounds like she does.

Really.

And I can't help but rise and comply with her command. We walk out of the portrait hole and eventually find our way to the third floor, all in complete silence. The only thing lighting the corridors are the torches on the walls, and all I can notice is how the fire highlights her hair, and how I can see the light of torches in her eyes, and I've just realised that I've forgotten to breathe again. It's so hard to remember to do that when I'm around her. Just her being near me overwhelms me completely.

Oh lovely. I sound like a cheesy romance novelist.

Wait. She's stopped. That's odd, because we haven't even gone half way through the floor. She turns around to face me and she leans against a tapestry hanging on the wall with graceful casualness that I can only get when I'm flying. I must look confused, because she answers my unasked question.

"James, you know that I wouldn't nag you about doing your Head Boy duties. I could have just as well gone with Dorcas, you know," she continues when she realises that I don't know who Dorcas is. "My friend from Ravenclaw? Dorcas Meadows?" Oh yeah, that small Sixth year girl with the short, curly black hair and really thick glasses. I nod in remembrance, and she takes it as her cue to continue.

"Well, it's obvious that there's something you want to say to me without half the school hearing it, so go ahead. Out with it." I feel my jaw drop. How could she have possibly known that I was watching her so I could get her alone?

"How do you know that I'm not going to ask you out again?" I ask. Another important question, good job brain.

Damn. First sign of madness: talking to ones' self.

"Well, as mad as this might sound, I actually kind of trust you. And I know that you know that I wouldn't say 'Yes', especially not in front of the whole common room."

"Wait. You said that you know that I know that you wouldn't say 'Yes' in front of everyone, but now I know that you _might_ agree if I asked you out now, right?"

"Maybe. But that's…"

"YES! See? I've started to crack that wall of hatred you feel toward me haven't I? I'm so good, I'm…"

"I never hated you, you know."

"I know. I meant 'wall of indifference', I suppose."

"Oh. I knew you knew."

"You knew I knew?"

"_Yes_, you knew I… wait, too much of the same words. Stop it!" Yeah, she's right. Ow, my brain hurts. I'll never say the word "know" or any of its forms again.

"So, uh, what were we talking about again?" I ask. Please let her forget, please let her forget…

"You wanted to tell me something." Arg. Damn. This was all Sirius's idea, about not being an idiot this year, but we never got to the "Proclaiming one's love" bit. I was only just starting to work on it back in the common room.

"Um. Right. Well about that…"

"Yes?"

"Er, you see I… I…" Keep breathing, keep breathing…

"_And what do we have here?_" AH! Oh, Merlin, it's just Filch and that damnable cat of his. Oh wait, that means detention, doesn't it?

Joy.


End file.
